The truth about relationships is that they are complicated. One moment you guys are cuddling each other and having a good time. And the next moment, you guys are fighting tooth and nail. But how do you know that he’s the one you should spend the rest of your life with? Don’t worry, keep reading to learn some of the signs that he’s the one you should marry.
Disclaimer – relationships are not mathematics equations that you can solve with a formula. If it was, perhaps, there would have been no broken marriages and heartbreaks.
However, your guy’s behavior can give you the green light that the future is bright for you guys. Or a red alert that he’s a monster in human form.
Whatever be the case, it’s better you watch out for these signs before you accept a proposal from any guys. Let me remind you that a broken relationship is better than a failed marriage.
So, without speaking too many grammars, here are 7 unwavering signs that he’s the one;
7 Unwavering Signs That He’s The One
#1. Your Values Align With His
Marriages fail these days not because the couples don’t love themselves. But most of them don’t share the same values.
Regardless of how much you love your partner, if your values don’t align, that relationship may not survive in the long run.
I have seen people who are divorced but still in love with each other. It’s a fact. Values are one of the things that can defeat love in a relationship.
So, once your values align with your partner’s, you don’t need a soothsayer to know that he’s a marriage prospect.
What it means to have shared values is that you guys both want the same thing. You both want to have a baby, have the same beliefs, financial goals, etc.
But you may not know your guy’s value unless you have an open conversation about them. That’s why it’s essential to have these conversations during the early days of the relationship.
And once you notice that your values don’t align with his, you should give the relationship a second thought.
#2. You Always Be Yourself When You Are Around Him
If you are always comfortable around him, that’s one of the signs that he’s the one. Of course, we all have our different sides – the formal and official side we display in the office and the crazy sides we show people we care about.
Once you notice that you are always comfortable being yourself when around him, he’s the one. Nothing makes a relationship more interesting than when your partner accepts you for who you are.
I mean, he doesn’t judge you. He understands your personality and always encourages you to be yourself when around him.
There’s no way your relationship or marriage will be boring if you are always yourself around your man. There a million and 1 crazy things you guys can do together for fun.
But if you can’t be yourself around him, you may not be able to bond with him.
#3. Your Conflicts Are Healthy
Do you still remember what I started this article with? That all relationships are complicated. Because you see the signs that he’s the one doesn’t mean you won’t have conflict.
But wait! Were you expecting a faultless relationship without conflict or argument? Oh no! You watch too many telenovelas and Zee World. That’s why.
There will always be a moment of conflict in every relationship. But how you guys handle the conflict is what will make the difference.
However, if he always shows you maturity and respect when he handles conflict, you are in the right relationship.
But what does a healthy conflict mean?
A healthy conflict with your partner means;
- He doesn’t trample on your boundaries
- You trust him to help you run some errands.
- He doesn’t have issues with constructive criticism.
- You can do a lot of things together without argument or quarreling.
#4. He Treats You Well (Signs That He’s The One for You)
There’s more to relationships than romance and having sex. Of course, these are important, but that’s not what relationships and marriages are all about.
Any man who treats you with kindness deserves your loyalty, undivided love, and attention. It’s one of the signs from the universe that he’s the one.
According to experts, when partners show kindness to themselves, it promotes stability and satisfaction in marriage.
When your man treats you with kindness, it makes you feel cared for, understood, and loved. But he always gives you the cold shoulder; you start feeling underappreciated, invisible, and unvalued. And that isn’t a good feeling to have in a relationship.
Contrary to popular beliefs, kindness in a relationship goes beyond an act of generosity. It’s the state of mind your partner has towards you by always thinking the best of you.
How to Know if Your Man is Treating You With Kindness
- He’s always sensitive about how you feel.
- No matter what, he always respects your decision. Even if you tell him you need sometimes alone, he will give you space without complaining.
- He loves you passionately without asking for it in return.
- He always supports you with his kind words of encouragement and motivation.
#5. You Always Feel Loved and Supported Without Conditions
When a man loves and supports you without conditions, it’s one of the signs that he’s the one.
Trust me, nothing gives a better feeling than knowing that your partner supports you emotionally. It gives great happiness and satisfaction to the relationship.
But love and emotional support are a two-way thing in a relationship. If you want to have a healthy relationship or marriage in the long run, always reciprocate whatever support your man gives you. Remember, it takes two to tangle.
Your man makes you feel love and supported when he;
- When he passionately listens to your experience after a long and stressful day at work.
- Encourages you when you share your dreams with him.
- Constantly adjust to how you feel every day. He knows the right time to play with you. He knows when to give you space. And he knows when to cheer you up.
Little things like these are priceless in a relationship. And if you have a man who gives attention to them, take him seriously. Who knows, he might just be the one God has for you.
#6. You Both Have a Healthy Level of Independence
Let me make something clear here. That you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you can’t be independent.
It’s a relationship, not a prison, for God’s sake. And you should know that your relationship is unhealthy if he doesn’t give you a level of independence.
Of course, there should be mutual support and care-taking in a relationship. But when this support starts to be one-sided, then there’s an issue.
Being independent means you are your own person in the relationship. That means you don’t have to give up things that make you happy just to please your partner.
Similarly, you can’t be giving all your time and attention to the relationship.
And if you can’t function or do anything in the relationship without his consent, that means he’s over-controlling. No matter how much love you guys have for each other, the relationship may not survive in the long run.
Here’s how to achieve a healthy level of independence in your relationship;
- Spend some time alone without taking permission from your partner.
- Ensure your partner respects your privacy and gives you space when you need it.
- Don’t alter your personality because of your partner.
- Don’t abandon the things you enjoy doing before you meet him.
#7. There’s a Good Sexual Chemistry Between You Guys
You can’t ignore the sexual chemistry between you guys. It’s one of the signs that he’s the one.
It doesn’t matter whether your guy is nice, lovely, shares the same values with you, and supports your dreams; if there’s no good sexual chemistry between you guys, the relationship may have issues in the long run.
Yes, you may think sex isn’t everything in a relationship. And that’s true; after all, people are still surviving a sexless marriage.
But you can’t call someone yourself a soulmate or significant other without good sexual chemistry.
Signs That You Have Sexual Chemistry With Your Man
- He can’t talk to you without making eye contact.
- You can’t resist your physical attraction towards him.
- You guys always hold each other’s hands unconsciously, even if you are in public.
- He leans close to you whenever he wants to tell you something.
- You can’t have a conversation with him without getting flirty.
- You can’t help but laugh whenever you guys are together.
These are the signs that he’s the one you should spend the rest of your life with. But there are instances when a guy has some of these attributes and still turn out to be an ‘asshole.’
3 Signs That He is Not the One God Has For You
Often, women have found themselves in a very toxic relationship because they give more attention to material things than personality. And by the time they realize that they are in the wrong marriage, it would have been too late.
That he rides a good car, smells nice, looks you in the eyes, and funny doesn’t make him the perfect gentleman. And if you realize this early, you can avoid being in a bad relationship to an extent.
Let me tell you a secret, most issues leading to divorce in marriage didn’t happen overnight. The couples noticed them earlier, but they allowed themselves to be blinded by the stupidity they called love.
You notice that your boyfriend wants to sleep with everything under the skirt. And you think nobody is perfect, he will mature out of his unbridled desire for women.
Do you want to know the reality? Nobody changes after marriage. We are who we are, and a mere promise of becoming a changed person won’t change anything.
So, here are signs that he is not the one God has for you;
#1. He’s Unkind to His Parents
Don’t expect love and kindness from a guy who’s unkind to his parents. Who doesn’t treat his mom right. And he’s comfortable about saying bad things about his parents, siblings, and every other family member.
I know you love him so much. Perhaps, that’s the reason you would want to sweep this red flag under the carpet. But if you do, you will blame yourself for it.
You can see a man’s true nature from how he treats his mom. And if he doesn’t regard his mom, it’s one of the signs that he is not the one God has for you.
Of course, he may be compassionate, kind, and caring towards you. But when things are rough, the monster in him will ultimately become visible. By then, it may be too late to cry.
#2. He’s Rude to Stranger
Do you want to know the true colors of your man? Watch how he treats strangers. Does he respect the waitress in a restaurant? How does he behave if someone steps on his shoes?
If he gets angry easily over petty issues, it’s only a matter of time before you feel his wrath.
#3. He Doesn’t Sweep You Off Your Feet
A guy should be able to express his feelings unequivocally. Otherwise, it’s one of the signs that he’s not the one God has for you.
If a man is still not sure about you, he would be careful of the words he uses. So, he will seldom tell you nice romantic stuff that will sweep you off your feet.
So, you don’t need to feel bad about it. If he doesn’t tell you nice things to sweep you off your feet, then he’s unsure of what the future holds for you guys.
Everybody has a relationship goal. And it’s essential to evaluate your partner and see if he can help you achieve your relationship goal. Otherwise, he doesn’t worth your time, affection, and attention.